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不吐不快(第1页)

终于,轮到居于末位的王美瑛老师发言。

她老娘早就想趁「新官上任三把火」──代理校长刚上任,还没把事搞砸、尚存威严之时──不吐不快:

「asyouknow,i’mlilyli’shomeroomteacher,aswellasarielliu’slanguagetutor.iknowclearlymyresponsibilitiesandobligations.ihavealreadymanifested,notjustonce,iamfullyawareofbeingobligatedtodowhatihavetodo,andreadytotakeanypracticalmeasures—andevenassistintakinglegalactions,providedmypresenceisnecessary.thiscommittee,nevertheless,kepthinderingmefromfulfillingmyduty.andnow,president,yourhonor,ishere.iwouldliketoreiteratemydisappointmentstoallofyou—」

「说中文,美瑛老师──体谅我们有些老师不讲英文。」

「getyourselvesaninterpreter,then—idon’tcare—whatihavetosayisayitoutloudandclear.andthosewhogotmypointgotmypoint—whicheverlanguageispeakin,老师。onlyifyouchoosetolisten,nottoonceagainhushmebyshoutingandhissing──ah-uh,herewegoagain—nowplease,letmecontinue...」

「很失礼耶王老师──」「尊重一下好不好?」「权宜问题、权宜问题!」「主席,立刻将王美瑛赶出去!」

见主席的神情比雕塑的表情更加肃穆,叫嚣的人员只好乖乖闭嘴。

「thewholeincidentjustremindsmeofj.d.salinger’sfamousnovel,thecatcherintherye.oneparticularpassageiwanttosharewithallofyou—andiassureyou:itdeservesyourattention.now,bearwithme—itgoeslikethis:

「‘ikeeppicturingallthelittlekidsplayingsomegameinthisbigfieldofrye.thousandsoflittlekids.nobody'saround-nobodybig,exceptme.andi'mstandingontheedgeofsomecrazycliff.whatcouldihavetodo,ihavetocatcheverylittlekidiftheystarttoruntowardthecliff—ifthey'rerunningandtheydon'tlookwherethey'regoing,ihavetocomeoutandcatchthethat'sallidoallday.i'djustbethecatcherintherye.iknowthatsoundscrazy,butthat'stheonlythingiwillhavetobe.’」

「letmetellyou,mypeerandrespectfulseniormembers,howregretfuliam,rightnow,righthere,tohavetoattendthispointlessmeeting;notbecauseihavetoplaythelittlegamewithyouweaklings,orbecauseihavetositinthismeetingroom,discussingsomeinsignificantissuesover‘theschool’sprestige’ortheso-called‘measurestothecurrentprcrises’andwastemytime—oh-oh—

「somepeopleinthisroomwhoactuallyspeakenglishfeltseriouslywrongedandstarted—youdogetmypoint—thisisexactlywhyicallthemembersinthiscommitteeweaklings—

「allofyousawthe‘elephantintheroom’butchosetoignoreitcompletely.ifthereisapinkelephant,letuspointitoutwithourfingers—ifthereisabigwolfhidinginthewood,lurkingtoharmourkids—let’sgetit,then!why—isn’tit‘aperfectdayforthewolf?’idon’tseenopointsthatwestillsithereandwaitforamessiah-likefiguretosavetheday,toremovethethreatforus,whilewearestillfarfrombeinglatetotakeaction.

「iregrettedit,ideeplyregrettedthatifailedtobethat‘catcherintherye’whentherewasakid,anabsolutelylovelysweetheart,whojustranstraighttowardthe‘crazycliff,’whilestillwithinarm’sreach—icouldhavecaughtherinmyarms[acatchinherthroat].iregrettedthatwejustletithappen,asshejustfelloverthenest,withouttheslightestchancetogrowupandlearntoflutterherlittlebutbravewings—」

「够了喔,王老师。今天不是来听你发洩情绪──是来解决问题──」

「那前面开好几次会怎么都没看你们解决问题!」

美瑛的反驳令在座的人员,除主席之外,全都愣住了。

没等被震慑的人回过神,美瑛继续质问:

「前面开那么多会,你们哪个有要解决问题──」

「嘘──」「嘘──」「嘘──」

台下开始发出嘘声,随后则是更多附和者加入行列。

「oh,oh,somepeoplearesweepingawaythepersontheydisagreewith—finebyme,iknowiamneverwelcomehere.themomentisteppedintothisschool,i’dalreadyknownyouallhatedmetothebone.youallseemeasanoutsider,ifnotapariah—whichisfine.iknowthehonestoutsideralwaysgetsexpelledfromthecitystatejustbecauseshespeaksthetruth.」

美瑛已经起身,气冲冲奔向门口,用力扭开门把。

「sincethismeetinggetsusnowhere,now,pleaseallowmetotakemyleave.」

对着主席说完最后一句话,她愤怒地甩门离去。

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